Stitchy McYarnpants

Confessions of a husband-neglecting, cat-shooing, yarn-hoarding knitaholic. But in a good way.

Tuesday, August 30, 2005

The Museum of Kitschy Stitches, Vol. VII - Living in the Eighties

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Blogger Stacy said...

Like.. Oh MY GAWD!! That's like tohtally Grody to the Max!..Like, You Know?!

Oh sweet gods in heaven!
Please, don't let this stuff come back around.. Please.. God No!

8/30/2005 02:01:00 AM  
Blogger AmyP said...

I was laughing... until the cat
What's the US version of the RSPCA? That woman should be locked up for cruelty to animals and crimes against fashion!

8/30/2005 05:10:00 AM  
Anonymous Laurie said...

Fabulous commentary! The cat was the capper. There isn't a word in Yiddish beyond schmata that can capture any of these heinous crimes.

8/30/2005 05:40:00 AM  
Blogger happyspider said...

Omigod! i saw that bikini sweater pattern in a second-hand book shop last week and laughed so hard i cried and freaked out the store owner... how very coincidental.
"Don't have a waste or freaky orange tan? crochet yourself one!"
*wipes tears from eyes

8/30/2005 07:33:00 AM  
Blogger Kate said...

The woman holding the cat looks a little concerned, as well she should since the bundled cat is ready to claw her eyes out.

8/30/2005 07:52:00 AM  
Blogger Cheryl said...

I love the picture of the cat!!! The woman looks like she is sacrificing it to some cult god.

8/30/2005 07:57:00 AM  
Blogger Gina said...

You really need to post a disclaimer when you do these sorts of posts: "Please wear your Depends and do not drink whilst reading!".

8/30/2005 08:10:00 AM  
Blogger Jennifer said...

I think I just aspirated my tea. Oh my God that is hilarious. That cat looks so pissed off to be cozied up in that nightmare. The "overalls" and knitted tan and bikini are priceless.

8/30/2005 09:07:00 AM  
Blogger Martita said...

Oh my God, that poor cat.

8/30/2005 09:28:00 AM  
Anonymous Cambria W said...

Someone should call the ASPCA to report a vicious act of animal cruelty. That poor cat. But I may keep that in mind for the next time my cat decides to spray my $300 Coach bag!

8/30/2005 09:35:00 AM  
Blogger Theresa said...

Marvelous. You've outdone yourself! Or maybe it's that I was wearing those legwarmers mid-80's... And that poor cat!

8/30/2005 09:49:00 AM  
Blogger IndigoMuse said...

Thanks for leaving the cat for last. I could barely contain myself through this post. What were people thinking. Hideous, just hideous.


8/30/2005 09:52:00 AM  
Anonymous chris said...

OMG! Coffee shooting out my nose, I'm laughing so hard! Knitted cat cozy! EEP!

8/30/2005 09:58:00 AM  
Blogger Miriam said...

OMFG!!! Although the rest of it was so amusing and made me glad that I was so young in the 80's, The Cat Sackā„¢ was the shocker!

8/30/2005 10:03:00 AM  
Blogger Jean said...

Oh, that cat is so PISSED! Excellent examples of 80's "fashion" :)

8/30/2005 10:20:00 AM  
Blogger Praxillea said...

I thought my hats for cats was bad, OMG! I can't stop laughing over that cat! Thanks so much for the laughs!

8/30/2005 10:20:00 AM  
Blogger amy said...

That. Poor. Cat.

OMG, I have to make one now...

8/30/2005 10:25:00 AM  
Anonymous Juno said...

I love the look on the cat's face: "just let me get a paw free, bitch, then you'll pay."

Do not anger the cat, they have a long mind for vengence.

8/30/2005 10:31:00 AM  
Blogger Lisa said...

Oh that poor cat. lmao

8/30/2005 11:00:00 AM  
Anonymous fiftympg said...

Oh, come on, you all! Stitchy pasted those cat parts into the photo. No cat's but is so big as to fill that woman's hand! Funny as heck!

8/30/2005 11:12:00 AM  
Blogger Anne Marie said...

That cat...someone ought to be arrested. As should the designer of the bikini top. Maybe not the other people...I think I sported a few of those sweaters in the 80s.

8/30/2005 12:33:00 PM  
Blogger megan said...

who does that to a cat? Poor little thing.

Love the blog.

8/30/2005 12:53:00 PM  
Blogger La said...

OMFG! Must...Knit...Cat...Cozy!

8/30/2005 01:01:00 PM  
Blogger Soulknitting said...

Hhehhehhhhe. You've done it again. Especially the CAT!!

8/30/2005 02:00:00 PM  
Blogger KathyMarie said...

Holy crap, I just drenched my keyboard

8/30/2005 02:37:00 PM  
Blogger SCarrGo said...


All Hail Stitchy!!!

8/30/2005 02:43:00 PM  
Anonymous said...

Who's up for a Cat Cozy KAL?

8/30/2005 03:07:00 PM  
Anonymous Donna said...

That looks just like my cat -- for the life of me, I do not know how they got that cat into that and lived to take the picture.

8/30/2005 04:15:00 PM  
Blogger Diane said...

I've wet myself! i have!! i'm menopausal and that's my excuse and i'm damn well sticking to it!!!Where do you get them from?i've laughed until the tears ran down my legs TeHe....That cat!!! resident evil or what??? and booby button woman...crikey i daren't even risk one eye to look at her..she'd have your eye out! i think she'd forgot to remove the cornplasters she was using for her " no bra" photo shoot!!ROFL

8/30/2005 04:23:00 PM  
Blogger TheBunny said...

Was cocaine the drug of choice in the 80s in order to accomplish all that knitting or is all that knitting the result of all the cocaine?

I'm seeing a definate connection though.

8/30/2005 04:45:00 PM  
Blogger PURLPOWER said...

Maybe the cat was on coke as well....

Laughing till I cried, I haven't done that for such a long time, I'd forgotten how painful it is to laugh so hard. Thanks for reminding me Stitchy. Top bloggin'

8/30/2005 04:54:00 PM  
Anonymous Jen said...

Way too funny, esp. the cat! And yes, the 80's were a bad fashion time for everyone...

8/30/2005 05:18:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You'd NEED those popeye arms to HAUL that first sweater out of the washing machine!!! It must weigh 2 tons when wet. You'd be dragged to at least your knees if you got caught in the rain.

8/30/2005 06:38:00 PM  
Blogger subloke? said...

Okay, so first I thought I was having some sort of flashback, but the laughing and the fear of wetting myself snapped me out of it. So awesome! Where did you find these pics?

The bikini sweater???? WTF???? The t-shirts were bad enough, but you know, those were purchased on a whim at the beach or the amusement park, but to choose that pattern, buy the yarn and actually KNIT IT??????

Oh. Yeah. I'm not a cat person, but the picture of the homicidal cat in the cat bag (with convenient tail opening) made me snork and nearly choke on my supper. Then, it made me want to adopt that cat just to get it out of that horrible living situation!!!!

Nicely done!

8/30/2005 07:14:00 PM  
Blogger Christie said...

It's a combo cat bed/litter box. Too much.

8/30/2005 08:51:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

HA HA HA !!! That's too stinking funny!

Someone needs to explain to that designer what the term "catsuit" really refers to. Because that ain't it!


8/30/2005 11:21:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Fauxveralls . . .
*snork* *giggle*
*tinkle tinkle*
(that's me wetting my pants)
julia fc

8/31/2005 03:56:00 AM  
Blogger Rabbitch said...

the cat. the cat, the cat, the cat.

you owe me a new keyboard.

8/31/2005 05:13:00 AM  
Anonymous April said...

I think I hyperventilated ... by the time I got to the cat I was SCREAMING. What a fright - I oughta know - "Class of '87" whyaah
You have a literary gift, and could write a book, or a sit com script! sigh, that was great and horrific... I'm so confused.

8/31/2005 09:27:00 AM  
Anonymous jpt said...

So the twisted designer who came up with the cat thing ... do you think there were multiple fittings to get the sleeves lengths correct? Seriously though, this picture proves that there's more to knitting photography than lighting and focus ... there's not being crazier than a loon.

8/31/2005 10:00:00 AM  
Blogger patti said...

Holy crap are you funny!!! You just gave the biggest laugh this morning, thanks SO much! BTW, you should have posted a warning that when you click on the JLO link, she will start SINGING at you!

8/31/2005 11:11:00 AM  
Blogger Stacy said...

I agree that the designer of the cat-sack should be locked up in an acrylic straight jacket, but have we all forgotten about that poor bridesmaid and flower girl? Talk about cruel and unusual punishment.

8/31/2005 11:50:00 AM  
Blogger Beth said...

Oh. My. God.

My mom has that issue of Knitters with the cat abomination.

I'm so glad I didn't start knitting again until the late 80's. Of course, the 70's were bad enough.

8/31/2005 10:40:00 PM  
Anonymous elisa said...

Stunned. Floored. Speechless.

Okay - not entirely speechless. That poor cat. That poor, poor cat. I mean, that poor cat!

9/01/2005 07:18:00 AM  
Anonymous Ann said...

Ok. I was, like, remembering something I had? that was just like that? and that? and omigawd! -- that? Feeling like my best fashion years were behind me when I saw the cat....Jolted back to the present and glad to be here. Except, I really do miss my garter stitched-so-that-it-looks-like-chenille maid/little house on the praire apron. Really.

9/01/2005 08:11:00 AM  
Blogger Dani said...

First off, your opening paragraph made me want to go find a "Best of Culture Club" CD. Secondly, I have to hang my head in shame because I think the overall vest is kinda cute.

9/01/2005 07:34:00 PM  
Blogger maryse said...

you're nuts.

and can i just say how happy i am to have not recognized any of those garments as something i might have knitted up in the 80's!

and that cat thing ... a tragedy

9/01/2005 09:18:00 PM  
Anonymous Juanita said...

That cat is PISSED!!

9/02/2005 02:25:00 PM  
Blogger Carrie said...

You had me at the commentary on the legwarmer trio, but the cat sack forced the coffee out my nose. Photoshopped or not, that pic is priceless. Sick and priceless.

9/07/2005 05:36:00 AM  
Blogger sarah said...

Oh my gosh! I almost died. I think I shot diet coke out my nose like Carrie. That cat is killer!

9/07/2005 12:38:00 PM  
Blogger Kelly said...

I laughed until I cried!!! Freakin' hysterical.

9/08/2005 08:05:00 PM  
Blogger InterstellarLass said...

It was all good till I got to the cat. Unbelievable. Is that for real?!?

9/09/2005 11:05:00 AM  
Blogger Kathen said...

The cat! OMG, if just getting a cat into a regular carrier is risky, how the heck did they get that ticked off cat into that thing?!

(Umm...Stitchy...I hate to be picky, there a MOKS Vol. VI?)

9/10/2005 12:56:00 AM  
Anonymous jeanne said...


Please, so I can have the experience of simultaneously laughing til my face hurts and losing control of my bladder, WRITE A BOOK about all the MOKS! You know there's plenty of material out there.

I gotta go lie down...

9/12/2005 05:33:00 PM  
Anonymous jessica~ said...

Those pictures are so funny!! Those bridesmaid dresses! Oh, man.

9/29/2005 03:28:00 PM  
Anonymous horrified said...

That woman holding the cat seems... tense. I think deep down she knows that if she let herself start screaming, she'd never be able to stop.

10/07/2005 01:20:00 AM  
Blogger Connie said...

Oh my God. Oh. My. God. HA!
Ya notice the cat's hind legs aren't visible? Only the tail? Poor, poor creature!

3/25/2006 01:02:00 AM  
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